Never Bet The Devil Your Electric Head
By: David Fullam

In the beginning, God made the Heavens and the Earth and upon the Earth he left a great number of his creations, the most dominant of which would ultimately be called "Human Beings." Human Beings were crafted in God's image and like the creator, they were created.
 
Humans came a long way in a short time (cosmically speaking). They made music and architecture, they roamed the skies and the oceans in the machines they made and even broke the bonds of gravity. But one of the most amazing creations to come from the mind of the Human Beings was a device that early on was called a "thinking machine" but ultimately took on the name of "computer." These computers were indeed impressive inventions and could do a variety of tasks. They, in fact, became so ingrained in the minds of the Humans that eventually they wondered whatever they would have done without them. It's a mark of how impressive the thinking machines were that beings other than  humans began to use the devices. The population of Earth would have been surprised to find out that Demons and Angels also made use of their creation so amazing these thinking machines were.

The cosmic beings called Angels and Demons used the thinking machines in order to monitor the human race whose souls they often battled over. These divine and not so divine lifeforms made use of the Internet. Yes, Angels and Demons surfed the Information Super Highway to keep a wary eye on the humans. In this way the could gather information in secret about the inhabitants of Earth and it was this facet that proved most useful to the Demons. Demons by their very nature loved the dark and had to conduct most of their operations in secret lest they incure the wrath of God and his Angels. Demons always had to
watch their backs whenever they bartered for a spirit. They never knew when an Angel would arrive to spoil the deal and save a  potentially lost soul. But the Internet helped the Demons to seek out a human whose soul might just be open for a deal. The humans, for their part, would've been taken aback, to put it mildly, that such creatures were seeking out their webpages and email addresses in order to wage the eternal battle for their souls.

But there was one Demon who didn't use the Net for this purpose. He was called Nywyng. Nywyng was a lesser Demon who never really amounted to much. A lot of this had to do with the fact that he wasn't very cunning or ambitious, two traits that a Demon must have if they are to be a success. Nywyng had never been on the fast track and was generally considered a joke by his brethren. Like many Demons he too had a computer and surfed the Net but instead of using this device as other Demons did to search out for souls to steal, he used it to take his  mind off his lousy existence which, to be brutally honest, was extremely lousy. Nywyng had come from a main Demon family, one which had brought a number of major souls to Hell but Nywyng was by nature lazy and simply could not muster up the drive to make a deal and secure a soul. He had married a Succubus named Kajar, which, in the beginning seemed to be the first good thing to happen to him but this too turned sour as Kajar turned out to be a nagging hag of a wife who constantly abused him and whined about how she had married the wrong man. Kajar was once an attrctive Succubus but over time her looks had deteriorated and she grew fat and unattractive, two traits a Succubus shouldn't have. Kajar herself was a major disappointment and took her frustrations out on her husband. She badgered him to try to use the initiative to become a higher ranking Demon as his brothers and sisters were but you can't use something you don't have. So Nywyng was stuck in a rut, a life that went nowhere with a wife that screeched and screamed all day about how she should have married a denizen of Hell who could've been someone.

Nywyng ignored all this as best he could and used his computer to take away his frustrations. He escaped into an online world of earthly movies, TV series and comic books... anything to escape the drudgery of his life. Nywyng belonged to several online communities; he visited chat rooms and bulletin boards, he wrote terrible fan fiction based on Star Wars, Star Trek and Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Now any other Demon would of course used this to ingratiate him or herself with the human community and when least expected offer the deal. Power, love or riches in return for a soul. But Nywyng had no such ambition or talent and blissfully whiled away the hours on the Internet oblivious to the fact that on the Net he was as big a joke as he was in Hell. His online contemporaries on Earth made fun of him behind his back and sent each other emails about how big a fool he was. Nywyng didn't care. He was ignorant of all this and even if he wasn't would probably continue to keep doing what he was doing. Anything to take his mind off of Kajar's latest moaning and groaning and the boring monotony that was his existence.

But one day Nywyng made a discovery that he hoped would turn around his life. Amazingly, the other Demons, the Angels and even the Humans (the creatures who had  created the computer) had not discovered this. What Nywyng had stumbled upon was the fact that inside the Net was another world. Not a world of webpages and chat rooms but a realm of living creatures! The Human Race had created these beings like God had created them but unlike God, they had no idea they had created a universe and the creatures that lived in it. Beings that like their creators had souls! Nywyng for once in his lazy life heard opportunity knocking. Here was an entirely new realm where Demons could snatch souls from, one in which the Angels were
not aware of, one that he had discovered. His kind could wheel and deal in this realm away from the prying eyes of their opposite number. And he had found it. Lowly Nywyng had stumbled upon the discovery of the ages and he began to put together a plan.

"If I go into this Cyber world and bring back the souls of some of its inhabitants I'll be praised as an innovator, a visionary. I'll finally be someone in Hell. I'll live up to the family name and can get rid of Kajar. Heaven, I'll be the most eligible demon in Perdition. Every Succubus will want me, all the Demons will want to be me, I'll be Satan's right hand Devil. Yes, I will do it!"
 
Nywyng felt a stirring in his black heart that he had never felt before. The need to succeed. His mind was made up that very moment. In a puff of sulphurous brimstone smoke, he vanished from Hell and reappeared above the world inside the computer, the Cyber World.

At first he was taken aback by what he saw. Enormous sprawling city states filled with living beings of various shapes, sizes and colors. Even for a Demon, it was difficult to take it all in. It was all bright and noisy. It looked a lot more like heaven than Earth or Hell and Nywyng had to squint his beady eyes in order to see properly. Now although Nywyng was stupid, he wasn't that stupid and knew he would have to start small. Baby steps before big steps. The Lesser Demon homed in on the vibrations of life and activity emanating from a small System. This System was called Mainframe and Nywyng decided that this would be the place to start his climb up the ladder.

Nywyng landed in Mainframe and invoked his power of invisibility. No need to announce his presence until it was the right time to do so. He stared at his surroundings and became amazed at how unusual it all was. The inhabitants of this place were certainly a strange lot. They looked like numbers, two numbers to be exact. The numbers 1 and 0. But it wans't the look of the beings that brought him here, it was their souls he needed.
 
"It's time to get started," he thought as he knelt to the ground. He pricked up his pointy ears and began to scan for the tell tale signs of a potentially lost soul which included longing, desperation and despair. He soon found out it would be easier said than done. Nywyng was surprised to find that virtually everyone in Mainframe was pleased with their lot. They were an incredibly happy and content race of beings. He sensed that they had just fought and won a great war against a mighty enemy and restored their city to greatness.
 
"Too bad I didn't stumble on this place earlier. War breeds the perfect conditions in which to find a lost soul. Geuss I'll have to try harder." Nywyng doubled his concentration, marshalling all his power which wasn't much considering his lesser Demon status but he hoped it would be enough.And amazingly it was. It suddenly came to Nywyng. A soul that cried out for love that it could never have. A soul that had longing. "Bingo," the Demon said and he homed in on the emanations.

Old Man Pearson sat back in his favorite reclining chair perched on the porch of his modest home. He sipped his Energy Beer and watched as his automated street sweepers returned to the junkyard after their cleaning function was fulfilled for the day. Pearson was Mainframe's garbage man for lack of a better term. He maintained all the street sweepers which kept Mainframe spotless and clean. His home was located right next to the junkyard and he made the most of it. Pearson loved gadgets and on occasion found all manner of valuable spare parts and mechanisms in the junkyard pile. Various gears and sprockets for many differing types of machines could be found there with a little hard work and Pearson was generous enough to allow others to come to the junkyard and search for what they needed as long as they knew what they were looking for and didn't take up too much of his time. Young Enzo Matrix had at one time built an air cart from various spare parts in the junkyard and Mainframe's Guardian, Bob had also found useful pieces for his ancient car in his ultimatley losing battle to keep the old thing running.
 
Some people might have looked down on Pearson's job, but he treasured it. He loved Mainframe and helped to keep it beautiful. But there was the odd time or two that he wished for something more. That something was Ms. Brodie the school teacher. Ms. Brodie was the top teacher at Mainframe Public School 101 and Old Man Pearson had taken a fancy to her. She was certainly an eligible woman. She had never married, and in fact one could say she was married to her work. She had been a school teacher for as long as anyone could remember and she did her job well. Ms. Brodie had the respect of her students and her peers and had recently become something of a celebrity after it became known she had been the teacher of Enzo Matrix, the little sprite who grew up into a man, but not just any man. He had been the man who defeated Mainframe's conqueror, Megabyte. For her part she took it all in stride and continued to dedicate herself to her work. She was quite modest and Pearson admired that.

He had actually met Ms. Brodie a long time back when he had gone to empty the school's trash compactors. They had even chatted briefly and Pearson soon came to realize that she had worked a spell on him. He dreamt about her often. Pearson believed that she was the woman for him but didn't know how to go about wooing her. Pearson, too, was married to his job. It was his calling but certainly wasn't hers. How would it look if Mainframe's top teacher began to be seen with Mainframe's garbage man?  It wouldn't be right for her. Pearson believed she deserved better but it wasn't easy to get rid of the  longing in his heart. What he wouldn't give for one night with her. The chance to kiss and hold her just once.

Now this of course would be the perfect time or a Demon to make his presence known. And Nywyng did just that. In a burst of light and a puff of smoke, the lesser Demon appeared. The sight toppled Pearson from his chair as he spilt his energy beer on himself. But before he could curse his situation the Demon spoke.
 
"Greetings Pearson of Mainframe."
 
Old man Pearson drew himself up from the porch and started to wipe the beer off himself. He stared intently at the stranger and took notice of his red skin, pointy ears and small horns. This was definitely not a citizen of the city
 
"And what manner of creature are you supposed to be, my boy?" Pearson asked.
 
The Demon approached him. Nywyng noticed the beer running down Pearson's front. "I am terribly sorry. Here allow me." The Demon snapped his long fingers and the mess disappeared leaving the garbage man clean.
 
"Why, thank you my boy" Pearson said, more than a little perplexed.
 
"Now would you mind answering my question?"
 
The Demon smiled and took on his most polite tone of voice. "Ah, yes, of course. Mr. Pearson, my name is Nywyng and I am a businessman, a maker of deals, a trader in, well, certain special items. And you eem to have an item that I would certainly like to strike a bargain for."
 
"Well feel free to look around the junkyard and see if you can find what it is you seek. If you have any questions then don't hesitate to ask." Pearson said.
 
"Ah, Mr. Pearson, you see what I am seeking is not to be found in the junkyard. I seek a far more intangible and precious item."
 
Pearson, who was not a terribly patient man, was beginning to tire of this already. "Then would you mind telling just what is is you might be looking for because I'm a tired old man who can think of a million better things to be doing at this moment."
 
The Demon flashed a radiant grin. "A man who is direct and to the point. How admirable. Well sir, I can be direct and to the point too. You see the item I seek is, well to be perfectly blunt, your soul."
 
Pearson's mono eye grew wide. "Eh, run that by me again boy. You say you want my soul? Now who in their right mind would ask for such a thing?"
 
"Mr. Pearson, as you can no doubt tell I'm not from around here. I'm neither binome, sprite, nor virus but like you I am a businessman. You see, I come from another realm all together. A realm where deals are made and contracts are drawn up. That's what my people do and the items we broker for just happen to be souls."
 
Pearson didn't seem to be fazed by any of this. "So you barter for souls eh? Well in my life I have never heard of such a crazy thing. And what pray tell could I get in return if I by chance decide to take you up on this strange offer?"
 
"Now we are getting somewhere," the Demon thought to himself. "Why Mr. Pearson, you can have whatever you wish. Whatever you want is in my power to give. Power, riches, a better social posistion. No longer would you be a garbage man. Deal with me and you can have in your possesion whatever it is you truly desire. Like for instance a certain woman named Ms. Brodie."
 
At the sound of this Mr. Pearson shot to attention. "Would you mind telling me just how it is that you know about my feelings for Ms. Brodie?"
 
"I know a great many things my friend. I know you desire her, that you love her from afar. Sell me the item I wish and you could have her by your side. She would be your lover, your friend. Your loneliness would abate and you would be complete. I know what you want and you want her am I not correct?"
 
Now Mr. pearson was stunned and for a few moments he could say nothing so Nywyng decided to sweeten the pot a little more.
 
"Remember my friend, she and whatever else you wish can be yours. You could be the leader of these people and she could be there by your side night and day. A life of love and riches, it is yours for the taking." And with that the Demon snapped his fingers again and a contract and a pen appeared out of thin air and floated into Pearson's hands. "Decide what it is you truly desire, my friend, and then sign this contract and whatever it is can and will be yours."
 
Mr Pearson handed the contract back to the Demon and then thought for a moment. "You could give me whatever it is I truly want. The woman I love from afar could be mine?"
 
"I got him now!" Nywyng thought. "Yes, if she is what you want, she will be yours. I can make it so. I can make dreams come true."
 
Pearson rolled the proposition over in his mind and then answered. "I'm sorry my boy, but I respectfully decline the offer."
 
If a red Demon could turn white then Nywyng could. It was as if the color drained from his face. "Uh, eh, huh?" the Demon stammered until finally geting out the words, "I beg you pardon?"
 
"I have decided to decline your gracious offer young man. It's just not for me."
 
"But, but I can offer you whatever you want. Whatever you desire. Surely you won't turn down so gracious an offer in return for such a modest fee?" Nywyng had come this far, he couldn't blow it now.
 
"A soul? A modest fee? I don't think so my boy. I'm rather attached to my soul. If I were to give it to you in return for the hand of Ms. Brodie, well I wouldn't make much of a catch for her now would I? She would certainly deserve better than a man with no soul. It's tempting, my young friend, but I respectfully decline. Good day to you."
 
Nywyng now saw opportunity leaving town. He had to do something and quick. "But if not her then what else? I said I could give you riches, power, whatever you want. There are millions of pleasures out there, yours for the taking. Just sign my contract and I will give you fulfillment."
 
Old man Pearson shook his head. "No my boy. I may not have much but I'm content with what I have. If I were to sell you my soul then I would have even less now wouldn't I? That doesn't seem to be much of a bargain to me. For the last time, I decline the offer. Good day to you."

 Nywyng began to panic. It was time to switch gears. "Alright then, so be it. If you won't make a deal then maybe there could others here that will take me up on my offer, Ms. Brodie perhaps."
 
Pearson turned around with a start and looked the Demon in the eyes. "What did you just say?" he said in an agitated tone.
 
Nywyng heard opportunity driving back up the street. "Yes, she might be more open to a deal. She might wish her desires to be sated. I'm sure she will be more responsive."
 
Pearson grew angry. Just as the Demon hoped.

"Now you look here, you will not approach Ms. Brodie, ever! You will leave her out of this."

"As you wish. I will not touch her. On condition that you sign my deal. How's that?" Nywyng just felt his stock in Hell go up a couple notches.
 
"Now you listen to me, you will not touch Ms Brodie or any other citizen of Mainframe. You will leave this system and never return. Do you understand?"
 
Nywyng was really getting put out. "Time to put this fool in his place," he thought. "No, you listen to me old man, I am a Demon of the First Circle of Hades. I am power. I could crush you and this system into atoms if I chose to do so. I came to make an honest deal. I gave you a chance for greatness and you spit in my face? You have made a grievous error old one. You have made a terrible mistake!"
 
Pearson reached down and grabbed the empty beer bottle. "The only one who made a mistake is you, my boy. I gave you the chance to leave. Now you're going to make me do something I promised to never do again."
 
With a motion suprisingly swift for one so old, Pearson swung the bottle and broke it over Nywyng's head. The Demon went to his knees with yell of agony while Mr. Pearson took off towards his shack. Once there he slammed the door shut behind him.
 
Nywyng raised himself in a cloud of pain. No little man would get the better of him. If need be, Demons could, on certain occassions, take a soul without a deal. It was a messy, long process without finesse so most didn't opt for it, but Nywyng was determined to better his social posistion. If he had to rip a soul out kicking and screaming then so be it. "Pearson, I'll rip your soul from its foundation and leave your body a dried husk. You can't hide in that shack. I haven't come here to be made a fool of."
 
Nywyng strode with great purpose to the little shack and flung open the door. But what he saw inside was not Pearson. It was instead a tall, lanky, spidery type thing that seemed to be pointing a long staff in his direction. Nywyng didn't even have time to utter an exclamation or question because a purpleish, black beam of plasma shot out of the staff and hitting the Demon putting him out of consciousness.
 
Nywyng awoke shortly in a compromising posistion. He was on his knees with his hands trapped behind his back, laced together by the plasma energy the staff had hit him with. Before him stood the creature that had imprisoned him, the tall spider-like being. It clutched the staff in its right hand. Its limbs were quite long and thin but even so the creature radiated power. And then it spoke, with a voice sounding like a man who had just swallowed molten metal.
 
"I told you I would do something I would regret. I gave you the chance to leave here but you didn't listen did you, you pathetic fool."
 
Nywyng at last understood what this thing was. "Pearson?" he exclaimed. "How can this be, what are you?"
 
The being that Old man Pearson truly was stood resolute and did move but did continue to speak. "You can read minds. You felt my love for Ms. Brodie and homed in on it. But you were careless. You didn't dig deep enough. You didn't look beneath the shell at what I truly am." Without waiting for Nywyng to ask, he continued to explain. "What you saw before was not my true self but a shell. A facade so that I may fit in with the people of Mainframe." He lifted the staff above his head and began to twirl it in a ritualistic fashion. "I am, or was, Talon, High Talon, Talon the dispatcher, Talon of the Seventh Brotherhood." He stopped twirling the staff, a Gibson Coil Pike, and returned it to his side. "I was a Code Master."
 
 Nywyng was about to speak but Pearson cut him off. He pointed the pike at Nywyng's mouth and a burst of the plasma energy encircled the demon's lips, silencing him.
 
"You wanted an explanation, you will get an explanation, but you will not speak until I allow it, understand?" Nywyng began to sweat uncontrollably but nodded his head yes. The Code Master continued. "We Code Masters are feared throughout the known Net and the Web. We are killers for hire, assassins. No one can escape us, and in our history no one has. I myself was one of the best or worst depending on your point of view. I attained the exalted rank of High in near record time. Thousands died at my hands. I was one of the most sought after Code Masters in all of the one hundred brotherhoods. But one day, I grew tired of it all. I became that rarest of creatures, a Code Master with a conscience. I began to think about those whom I killed, their friends and families that were left behind to grieve and one day I could take it no more. Somehow I had developed compassion. Not a good trait to have in a Code Master. I could no longer kill. I then did something that was unprecedented in our history, I quit the guild and left my brotherhood. I sought penace for my sins and wandered for a long time. Then I came across Mainframe, this small system and decided that my days of wandering were over. I asked for and received refuge from this system's Command.Com. He welcomed me here and allowed me to live with his people. I remade myself in the form of a binome and took the job of keeping Mainframe clean. Only a handful of beings here know my secret and they are content to leave me in peace. I haven't assumed my true form or used my Gibson Coil Pike in, well, I don't know how long. Until today, that is. You made me do something I swore never to do again." Pearson leaned in close to the cowering Demon. "You don't know how angry that makes me." Pearson pointed the pike at Nywyng's mouth and withdrew the plasma. "If you wish to speak now, you may."
 
Nywyng was once again back to his old self: a weak-minded buffoon. He sat quivering in fear and wished to Satan that he had never come across the world in the computer. Through chattering teeth he finally spoke. "You, you, you, you don't, don't mean to kill, kill me do you?"
 
Pearson grasped the pike with both of his long fingered hands. "No, I will not kill you. I swore to never take another life and that is a promise I would rather die before breaking. Even something as pathetic as you deserves to live. Call me merciful or foolish but you won't die by my hand."
 
Nywyng felt like kissing Pearson's feet, so relieved was he. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you," Nywyng repeated over and over again. He would get out of this scrape intact.
 
"But," Pearson bellowed.
 
"Knew there would be a catch," the Demon muttered.
 
Pearson swung the pike at his captive. Its energies raised him in the air and brought him closer to the Code Master's face. "You will never return to Mainframe or any other system in the Net. You will never tempt the citizens of the cyber world with your deals. If you don't heed my words then I will not be so kind a second time. Trust me, you really don't want to discover any of the ways a Code Master can kill. Because if you do come back here, I will break my promise. Do we have an understanding?"
 
"Yes, yes" Nywyng cried out, attempting to hold back his fear. "I will never return here, you have my solemn promise, I swear it, I swear it!"

Although difficult to tell, it looked like the spidery old Code Master was smiling. "I'm pleased that we have reached an agreement. Now begone!" The Gibson Coil Pike let off a burst of bright energy and the Demon vanished. Back to hell.

Pearson bent down to one knee. He began to breath slowly and deeply. Little by little his features began to change and shift, back to his form of a binome. When the metamorphosis was finished, he once again looked like a citizen of Mainframe. He stood up and walked back to his shed. Once inside he split the Gibson Coil Pike back into its two seperate halves and placed them safely again under lock and key. He then strode back to his little house and fetched another energy beer from the fridge. He returned to the porch and sat back in his chair, taking in the end of a Mainframe afternoon. It had truly been a strange day. He had done something he swore never to do again. He had taken back his code master form after such a long time in hiding.
 
"Oh well, at least no one saw what happened here today. My secret is still safe. But if that silly creature tries to break our agreement and comes back here, well, I will be ready for him. As always it seems I got the better end of the deal." The day's events got him to thinking. Thinking about making up for lost time. He wasn't getting any younger after all. "I think that tomorrow, I will call on Ms. Brodie and see if she is free for dinner one evening. Yes, that sounds like a good idea. A good idea indeed."  Old man Pearson sipped his beer and silently made a toast to new beginnings.

In a puff of sulphurous brimstone smoke, Nywyng the lesser Demon reappeared in Hell. From the next room he heard a familiar voice, that of his wife Kajar. "Nywyng, is that you? Where have you been all day? When I think of the Demons I could have married, why I chose you is beyond me. Nywyng are you listening to a word I'm saying?"
 
Nywyng cursed his luck and decided to never use a computer again for the rest of his days. The Code Master wasn't as merciful as he pretended.  "Why couldn't he have killed me, why? Why did he have to send me back here to this nagging old hag, why?"
 
On that day, Nywyng learned that even Demons can go to Hell.

END